Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
do herpes really smell.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
