If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
another moral hangover. fuck.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I cut my penus on the lid.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
