she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
soo... how was my night?
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