Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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