this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
How external is "for external use only"?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Randomize
