Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
