Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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