hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
