just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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