Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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