doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
