I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
