I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
