I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I understand Curling. That high.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Randomize
