Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
