I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
