I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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