Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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