how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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