margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
