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I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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