Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
