The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
