Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
