Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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