I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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