Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
The Olympian is in my bed
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
