i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
