He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
