i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Randomize
