around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Another day, another engagement, another cat
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize