Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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