Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Randomize
