Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
