Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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