This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
