drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Couch. On fire.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
