is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
