i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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