Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
