physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
