i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
