Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
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