6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
