even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize