is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
