guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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