If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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