glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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