Define "chronic" masturbator.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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