How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
